do any of you ever feel this way? when you're sick, you are pretty much in hibernation. no seeing people or hanging out because a) you're sick and dreadfully tired and b) you're sick and people are germaphobes. after the illness has passed, don't you just want to go back to normal and hang out with your friends? that's how i feel. that's how i always feel when i'm sick. being sick, to me, is a bit like being cut off from the world.
last thursday, i got sick. i missed work friday and monday, meaning that the entire weekend too, was terrible. it came and went and my body didn't even know it. neither did my social life. all week, i've been playing catch up at work and then going home to collapse and try to rest.
well, today is friday and i'm feeling better. the weekend is here. all i thought about this morning was, "hey, maybe i'll get to go to the gym with misty tomorrow and maybe we could see a movie or somethin'." nope, not going to happen. misty has a best friend, janie, and she's hanging out with her. not me.
when i got the email response back from misty, it was brief, to the point, and kind of took the wind out of my sail. it didn't sound like she wanted to hang out at all. no interest whatsoever in going to the gym either.
this is going to sound silly, but i'm just analyzing the situation here. all week, i've been the one sick. but, i've also been the one sending misty emails asking how she is and checking on her because she had to launch their new website at work. i got very little from her replies in emails, if any at all. she didn't answer my calls. when she checked the voicemail, she sent me a facebook comment to let me know she had been too tired to talk.
my facebook status says i'm lonely.
i am, it's true. the one friend i have here to hang out with doesn't want to hang out with me. i don't want to call nicole because she's on a drunken party rage with all of her new found freedom and that's not my scene. david and christina have pretty much fallen off the charts.
i'm lonely because right now i know that had we been back in texas, some of our friends would have wanted to hang out. fridays were kind of reserved as that. the weekends were social time. why is it that after 8.5 months of living here that nobody can fill that void for me?
1 comment:
there are always times in life when we feel this way. I'm sorry it was a rough week and weekend for you. Even though we aren't there to be with you and cheer you up, all your friends in Texas are always thinking of you. We are very proud of you for being adventurous and trying new things. Anytime you need to feel loved, just think of us. I hope this week is better for you!!
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