tonight's workout

32:30 on a stationary bike.
interval training - high resistance: 21, low resistance: 3
total distance: 6.48 miles
calories burned in 1 hour, 20 minutes of wearing heart rate monitor: 642

dustyn did 20 minutes on the bike with me, then he switched to the elliptical. when he's next to me, whether running or biking, it's so much easier for me to want to pedal harder or run faster. being on different equipment is more difficult because we're going at different resistances or paces.

after the biking, i did a good 15-20 minute ab workout, followed by a brief arm/back workout.

i've been reading a lot about how important it is for you to record your emotions because they can greatly impact what you eat and your workout.

today i felt:

• lonely because jenn is gone, kim is no longer in SD, nicole is distant. i'm nervous about moving back home - things haven't been the same since we've been gone, nor will they automatically go back to normal when we move back. everyone has new friends, new routines. i'm scared about putting the pieces back together. brian and kristin won't be in texas. that leaves a hole - a gaping hole.
• exhausted because i haven't had much to do at work and i'm frustrated. i feel like i sit down all day and they're neglecting me from doing work i'm more than capable of doing. i'm definitely on my way out, but i hate wasting my time. and their money. i feel a different type of exhaustion too - one from packing and staying up every night until after midnight to get things done. on top of that, i can't sleep at night. the new workouts are fueling my brain and it won't shut off at 10:30 like it used to. i lie awake thinking. and thinking... and thinking.
• distracted in the sense that i really started to feel the need to sort things out with nicole. i'm not speaking to her. she's not speaking to me. it's not healthy and neither one of us is being adult enough to talk about it. (i am supposed to have dinner with her tomorrow.) and all i really want to do is go home and pack. and i constantly have things to do to make the move go well - right now my brother needs to know if we can take some of his furniture because he's going to be living in a dorm at texas tech. i need to figure out where everything will go because he has to leave for TT before we get back to TX.
• overly hungry: i just wanted to eat continuously. my previous co-worker, stephen h. brought in donuts for debbie today because she's been out on medical leave for two months. it was a temptation and i gave in 1.5 times... which means, i had 1.5 donuts. and i had a coke - a real coke - not diet. for dinner - i had more carbs. we had a salad while i fixed the meal - baked chicken w/ rice (half whole grain, half white rice since we were able to empty both boxes to make the meal) - but on top of that, we each had a baked potato. that's way too much. my body was craving it though. all day i was able to convince myself to eat what i wanted without much willpower. i couldn't say no.